Friday, January 31, 2014

Getting Pretty Anxious

Shocking, I know.

I can't help but be scared that LO will decide to pop out just a measly 24 hours before I really, really want him to. I've been getting crampy feelings randomly throughout the day, but nothing painful or at all consistent. I wonder what the odds are of him actually making his debut in the narrow window that I have in my head? Probably slim to none, but I can't help but hope and pray (constantly) that he does. My mom let me know that my grandma will also be back from her trip to Mexico on Saturday. *groan* I know she expected to be in the room for Little Man, but was in California when he was born. I never had to drop the bomb on her that she would've been ejected to the waiting room with everyone else. I'm dreading having this talk with them and seeing their faces when I let them know that it will only be MyLovf and I in the delivery room again... Not only that, but I would prefer that they not come to the hospital AT ALL until after he's born. I have the option of laboring in a tub this time and I am definitely planning to use it. I have no intention whatsoever of having anyone but my husband and medical staff around to witness my mostly nakedness while I'm in there. Oh. Yes. One more thing. I also really want Little Man to be the first one to meet his brother, so I'm going to have to ask them to sit tight until they've had a little time together. I don't see them taking any of this well at all.

Man, I hate this.

I shouldn't be made to feel guilty because I want my birth experience to be a private and intimate event with my husband. Yet, that is almost surely what's going to happen.

Come on little one. Do mama a solid and make your grand entrance in the early morning hours on Saturday, ok? Please? Save your mama from the inevitable awkwardness and hurt feelings.

Ok. *shaking it off* Let's get a bit of happiness in here, shall we?

The ultrasound we had yesterday revealed that he is back to being head down! Woot! AND the GBS test came back negative! My midwife says I'll be able to avoid the IV altogether and just get the hep lock in L&D (which is totally fine with me)! I am so relieved :)

I've been pretty much living out of my hospital bag because I don't want to have to be running around getting the last minute stuff together when it's "go" time. I have it all in there now and just leave it open to access my hair dryer/makeup/deodorant/whatever as I need it. It also comes with me when I'm going to be far from the house. I am so ready! Not at all like when my water broke with LM. Speaking of, there is now a waterproof mattress pad down on my side of the bed and puppy pee pads on my driver's seat just in case. *heehee* I've been keeping myself occupied and distracted by doing stupid little things to make sure the after delivery pictures come out cute. Is that even possible? So I have changed my nail polish color three times (and yet they're bare right now...?), plucked my eyebrows, trimmed my bangs, and cleaned my wedding ring. All super vital stuff, right?

Listen up Universe! Early morning Saturday.  Ok? Yes? Thank you for your cooperation :) And as a little added incentive, here's a pic of my sweet little guy taken at our appointment.

The blob over his face on the left side is his hand, the blob on the right is the cord.