Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Not really an update:

I spotted for most of the day on Saturday and then Sunday and Monday there was nothing, so I thought whatever was causing it went away. That is, until it started up again today and was more brown instead of tan. It's a very small amount, so I'm trying to convince myself that everything is still fine. I mean, I'm not cramping or anything and it's not red, so everything is ok.


Still ok.

I have an appointment tomorrow to confirm that I'm pregnant for insurance purposes, but the doctor won't actually see me until I'm eight weeks along unless I have red spotting. I didn't mention when I made the appointment about my past miscarriages, but I'll probably say something tomorrow if the spotting hasn't stopped by then.

I hate this feeling. I can barely sleep for worrying. I just wish I was feeling SOMETHING. Some little thing to let me know that all is well. I was this.close to taking my last test this afternoon, but talked myself out of it. I forced myself to wait till tomorrow to pee in a cup.

I just need to feel a little better about all this before the end of the week or our weekend trip to California is seriously gonna suck.